If you want something from someone else, it’s probably a good strategy to offer this person a chance to do it out of generosity. Allowing them to feel good about themselves in exchange for a smile and a little gratitude. Win-win.
To demand something in a commanding way can be counterproductive. Suddenly there’s no fun in giving in. Instead of two winners, there are going to be one … well, maybe two losers. Bad mood and good times wasted on whining and arguing.
This might sound like common sense. And common sense is what I need to teach my kids. But when writing this I realize I probably should practice what I preach more. After all the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, and the tree would be pretty stupid blaming its fruit for it.
For four years we only had Trump-news, then we only had Covid-news and now we only have news from the war in Ukraine. It’s understandable. It seems we can only keep one subject top of mind at the time. These subjects take all the light while important issues such as climate change and efforts to replace fossil fuels end up in the shadows.
Rightfully, we need monitoring and reporting on the issues mentioned. But our inability to keep more than one thing in mind is deeply troubling. What is it about our impatience, our lack of attention and comprehension. Our unwillingness to engage with complex issues, to do the work of thinking instead of just settle for headline entertainment.
Scrolling through the news this morning I saw an ad for a political party that read like this:
”Double the punishment to make a criminal career in ”Name of troubled area” half as appealing”.
I find it shameful as well as saddening. A simplified solution to a very complex question. Preaching to a mob with some fake logic, implying a causality that isn’t true. Lock them up! Will we ever get past these kind of messages?
What would it take for people, en masse, to engage in a conversation about the society and world we want? – instead of the recent HBO series. Not that I’m any better, it seems I have my head in the clouds of art most of the times.
I wish I had the patience of a saint, but sometimes when people sound annoying my ears turn off. It might not be their voice, but their words or how they come across. I might miss the point they are trying to make.
Judging your own voice or your own work is difficult. It might be a skill in itself. Many are the songs that I abused at the top of my lungs. With so much emotion inside I wanted it all to be heard. If only it had been my intense study of Levi Stubbs in the Four Tops. But most likely I owe certain high-pitched reflexes to my juvenile years listening to a certain band from Dublin.
It hasn’t been an esthetic choice to belt. Rather it has sprung from a physical desire to feel the music in my body. No matter how it sounds, there’s an inner sensation that can only be had when you’re singing on the verge of breaking. Another thing is that when writing I seem to be more sensitive to the motion and emotion of melody in a higher register. Low down, it’s almost like melodies appear monotonous. There’s less drama. I might have to adjust my hearing. Or feeling.
Lately, I’ve realized that as a vocalist I might have more to offer if I strive for ease and effortlessness, allowing other nuances to come through. In a way, I suppose it rhymes more with my personality. But what really dawned upon me some time ago is how few of my favourite singers that come across as loud and strong. Most are actually pretty soft-spoken. Many sing close to the mic, almost whispering.
It’s easy to be annoying. It might even pay off, if you’re a kid. But when the silent, soft-spoken type suddenly speaks up … There are moments when a whisper can be really loud.
Everybody loves to complain about social media. Well, it’s just another mirror for human nature isn’t it? I have mixed feelings about them all, mostly because engaging in them takes time.
LinkedIn is a particularly puzzling to me. People really seem to like their jobs over there. Fair enough, some get lucky. And naturally it’s a place where you hang out if you need to recruit or if you’re looking for a job or a new job.
Not to mention all the people working on their brand. Polishing this or that. Freelancers seeking to be top-of-mind and career climbers bragging about their achievements. It’s not hard to see the psychology at work.
And still, it’s a strangely unnatural place. Everybody behaving as if they are at a job interview. Smiling a little too much, trying to look relaxed and confident, yet eager to work, to show ambition, or grit or exaggerated positivity. On the inside, people may be at the the end of their rope. Unemployed, marriages falling apart. And God knows what.
Even though I find it exhausting, I’m thinking it could be a really interesting scene to explore for human drama. I might have to look into it with some anthropologist-glasses on.
A medal is a silly thing. A piece of metal. An unnecessary impact on our environment. And still, having crossed the finish line I couldn’t make myself to say no thank you, which had been my intention. After all, I’ve thrown all previous medals in the recycling bin. So why bring another one home.
Yet, I think there is something in the moment of reception. On your best day it’s a way to celebrate your achievement on your lesser day it can be moment of acceptance. You gave it your best shot, you finished – and it is still an achievement.
If you think practically about things, there’s a lot of silly things in our culture. But then, we’re not really practical but emotional creatures. A medal is a silly thing. But so is a birthday cake or a wedding ring. It’s not the thing itself but the meaning and value we charge it with.
Everybody has their own race to run. Many run in spite of obstacles we don’t know about. Some run on talent or youth, some on willpower we can’t imagine. There’s little point in comparing yourself to anybody else, and there’s no point in complaining about the advantages others may have had. The race is yours, and it’s about choosing forward, as Amy put it, no matter the circumstances.
Today, I’ll be following the blue line. I run because I want to. I don’t know for sure what race I’ll be running. What kind of day it is or how it will feel. But in one and a half hour I’ll be on the start line to follow the blue line til I cross the last line.
The kitchen is a place where creativity often is necessary to solve problems of making the best possible meal of the ingredients available. Need is the mother of invention. There’s a lot to learn from that process. Too bad we spend so much time living in abundance.
Beef Stroganoff is a dish of Russian origin. It’s got its own entry on Wikipedia. There are different recipes. One of the famous is based on beef, onion, tomato and cream. Since beef was expensive in Sweden, people here exchanged the beef for a cheaper ingredient, falukorv – ”falu sausage” – a Swedish speciality, although in the lower price section. The resulting dish was pretty good and as a result the idea spread.
Meats aside, I think the principle is interesting as a creative technique. Keep the recipe of something established, but change the main ingredient and see what happens.
There’s a lot I’m fascinated by in Jamaican dub music. Dub is the result of a remix process in which the producer runs the separate instrument stems into a mixer, and by clever usage of the mixing board as well as outboard effects (spring reverb, tape-echo, phaser and filters) comes out with a new version – a dub plate of the original song.
The main ingredient in Jamaican dub is reggae music. Reggae is not what I do, so for a long time I’ve daydreamed about doing my own stroganoff version of dub. Feeding the mixer with other kinds of music. Folk, slow house and lazy beats.
For some reason, I never get around to it despite having all the equipment. Dub stroganoff remains a brilliant idea in theory. I’m not sure, but I believe abundance has something to do with my failure of putting it into practice.
Amulets come in different forms. Some might be worn like a necklace, like a small cross if you’re a Christian.
I might not have a mystic approach to these matters, but I realize I have amulets too. Objects of power that connects me to what I love. It’s a reassuring feeling to put my hand in my pocket and feel that an angular piece of plastic is lying there, promising a different life than the corporate powerpoint presentation I’m sitting through.
The guitar pick. It seems it’s of little use without a guitar. But actually, I tend to play guitar with my fingers most of the time. The main function of the pick is connection, solace and identity.
On certain days, when not making music is all that awaits. A guitar pick is not comfort enough. That’s when I need to slip an instrument in my bag. A small synth. A field recorder. A harmonica. Anything to promise me music is possible.
I might even wear an Ableton t-shirt under my shirt to really remind me of my superpowers.
It’s a shame there are so few public phone booths left for changing outfits these days.
My day job office is located in an old sugar factory. A big brick building from, I suppose, the 19th century. Located in the harbour. It took a lot of bricks to build it. Laying down each brick probably wasn’t fun. It was work. But the building got built.
I think of this as I head to get half an hour of guitar practice during my lunch break. Nothing sensational. Another brick. But if I keep at it. Who knows what skills I can build.
Well, is that banal or profound? Or both? I’m reminded of something else, all those moments in the past when I daydreamed about having started something earlier and imagining how good I would have become, how successful I would have been etc.
In September 2023 I’ll turn 50. I don’t daydream like I used to. I put down bricks. One by one. To get something built before it’s too late.
Tears, oceans and french fries. Salt is essential. When it’s missing you know. And when it’s needed you probably need it pure. Without added flavours. There’s nothing wrong with being creative of course. But when you need salt and all that is available is some mixed “herbal salt” you really run the risk of ruining the whole dish.
I think this might be true for a lot of sounds as well. Effects are cool. Just not all the time.
The Gentle Kind 